You get pumped up and make a new plan.
You create the ideal routine too.
"This time it'll stick," you think, feeling a little excited.
──But then, just a few days later, you're already out of breath.
You do it perfectly at first, stumble somewhere along the way,
and then disappoint yourself all over again.
You're not alone in this pattern.
There's a woman who had the exact same experience.
The Reality of People Who Try Hard But Still Break
This woman bought multiple new planners,
and even took on "75 Hard"—a famous self-improvement challenge.
(※75 Hard = A 75-day self-improvement program with strict daily rules for exercise, diet, reading, etc.)
Not just once—three times.
Yet every single time, she'd fall apart around day 8,
and once she ended up crying in her car while eating a gas station taquito.
It's kind of funny,
but behind it lies a feeling we all know too well.
- "I hate that I can't stick with things"
- "I'm doing the same thing over and over"
- "Why can't I do this?"
The harder you try,
the more crushing the moment you break becomes.
It's Not Your Weakness That Makes You Quit
First, know this:
Not sticking with things isn't a sign of weak willpower.
It's actually the opposite.
A design that's "too hard" is what breaks.
The human brain naturally dislikes:
・Heavy loads
・One mistake means everything's over
・Rigid rules
In psychology, this is called "All-or-Nothing thinking."
So it's not that you're weak—
this is just how the brain naturally responds.
What She Chose Instead: The "Reverse" Approach
One day, completely burned out,
she let out a deep sigh and said:
"I can't do this anymore. I'm done."
That's when it hit her:
"Let me try the exact opposite."
Instead of maximizing "discipline,"
she went for a "treat-yourself" approach.
She turned habit formation into
"a slightly fun 5-minute event."
Examples: Her "Cozy Reward Habits"
◎ Exercise
Dancing in her pajamas to a 7-minute YouTube video.
(34 days in a row, and her butt looks pretty good, apparently)
◎ Journaling
While doing skincare, recording a 1-minute voice message to her future self.
(Basically just "chatting with future me")
◎ Reading
Walking around her room while listening to an audiobook.
(Feeling like a Netflix character)
She called these
"tiny dopamine bribes"
Because they're "almost too easy," the brain loves them.
And surprisingly...
There might be lazy days, but "lazy weeks" disappeared.
This is actually correct from a behavioral science perspective.
The brain is strongly drawn to things that are "kind of fun," "easy," and "doable right now."
What You Can Do Starting Today Is Actually Very Simple
There's only one thing you need to do right now.
👉 Create a "5-minute, slightly fun way to keep going."
You don't need to make it complicated.
- Brew a nice-smelling coffee and sit at your desk for just 5 minutes
- Play one favorite song and do light stretching
- Turn "audiobook + walk" into "reading time"
- Put on a video of your favorite character while tidying your room
The key is to make it so
your body thinks "yeah, I guess I could do that."
It's not about willpower—it's about design.
What Changes Will Happen
Will this really work with such a relaxed approach?
You might wonder, but it actually works surprisingly well.
- You'll blame yourself less
- Even when you skip, you'll bounce back faster
- You'll build a real sense of "I can stick with things"
- Your action threshold will keep getting lower
- You'll avoid the future where perfectionism backlash breaks you
Instead of breaking from trying too hard,
continuing with a relaxed design makes you stronger in the long run.
Maybe you're actually
the type who thrives on rewards.
Your starting point is
today's 5-minute cozy reward.
If it's hard to stick with it alone,
using an online study room like CoFocusRoom,
where you can quietly focus with others, is also effective.
Sharing cozy consistency helps habit formation progress naturally.